Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Two things

1. I've already blogged today. I realize that.

2. Our redneck friend, the male version. I've spoken about him before, but Brian just called to tell me something and it's too good (bad?) not to share.

These people, like many others, live from paycheck to paycheck. They have two kids and a house and even though the wife has a good career, Jo Bob (not his real name) the husband, has long stretches where he's unemployed. This is one of those times. And right now of their three vehicles, zero of them are running. Jo Bob asked Brian last night if he'd help him work on the truck today and since Brian pretty much makes his own schedule these days, he agreed to help him.

Brian is good at a lot of things (dirty!), but mechanics is not one of them. I think pretty much Jo Bob is bored at home and wanted an excuse for Brian to go hang out for a few hours. Okay, I can understand that. What I can't understand is this:
He started calling Brian around 7:30 this morning. Brian listened to his voicemail and determined it was not an emergency so went back to sleep for an hour. When he woke back up, he had three more voicemails from Jo Bob. He called him back to see what on earth was so important, since they'd agreed Brian would be over there this AFTERNOON. The conversation then went something like this:

Brian: What's up? Is anything wrong?
Jo Bob: Naw man, I'm just drinkin' a cold one, getting ready to fire up the grill to put these here ribs on. (Remember, it is now somewhere in the neighborhood of 9 a.m.)
Brian: ...
JB: When ya comin' over?
Brian: Well, I need to go help my mom with some stuff and then I'm eating lunch there. I'll be over right after that.
JB: Oh, okay. Why don't you pick up some beer on your way over.
Brian: Um...okay. I probably won't drink any, but I'll get some for you if you want.
JB: Well, yeah. But if you're not gonna get here for awhile, I'll probably walk up to the store to buy some. (The nearest store that would both be open and selling beer is approximately four miles from their house)
Brian: Dude, I'm going to be there shortly after noon; you don't think you can wait that long?
JB: Naw, man! But go ahead and pick some up for me anyway; I'm sure I'll need more by then.

Unemployment.
Broken-down trucks in front yards.
Meat on the grill.
Rampant alcoholism.

They don't call them stereotypes for nothing.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know so many people from back home, who are just like that. In fact, um, I might be related to some of 'em.

Anonymous said...

So...uh...did they get the car running? hee!