I just thought of something. Is it a little strange that I'm inter-mixing stories of my almost-divorce with updates on us trying to have a baby? I'm not sure if it's a good thing or just plain bizarre. But I guess that's never stopped me before, so whatever.
I got a compliment today that I can honestly say I've never gotten before. During the HSG (big scary uterine x-ray) me, the doctor, a nurse and a med student (why there's always a large audience for public pubic viewings of me, I don't know) were all looking at the screen that shows what's going on and the doctor said, "That's one beautiful cervix." I didn't really know how to respond besides "...Thank you?" So that even though there was a cathiter and speculum inserted into my nethers and I was experiencing fairly significant cramping, hearing that everything looks great in your reproductive system tends to make the pain not matter so much. Or at all, in my case.
It went quickly and it went well and that's all I was hoping for. The next few weeks will be normal and then the next time I get my period, things start getting serious - fertility drugs, ovulation monitoring and even sex. Then if the sex doesn't work (which I'm sure it won't, because nothing is ever that simple or inexpensive for us), the next step is the actual IVF. Brian is funny. He mostly understands what's going on, but as we were getting ready this morning he said, "Do I have to masturbate again today?" For my x-ray? I said, "Only if you want to." Also when I was explaining the IVF procedure to him, part of which includes them "washing the sperm," he said, What - they think I have dirty sperm?" He's trying his best. I laugh at him, but don't blame him; all this is new to me too. Here I grew up thinking all you had to do to make a baby was have sex. Little did I know.
I can't thank you and you and you enough for sending me your thoughts during this strange time; it means the world to me. I didn't think I'd ever be keeping so many people up on what's going on with my endocrine system, but it turns out it's kind of nice. I plan on taking it nice and lazy tonight and try to get through some more Twilight. The last few pages I've read I've actually been able to stay awake, so I have high hopes for tonight. Yeah, not really.