I just tried posting a YouTube video of Amy Poehler rapping as Sarah Palin the other night on SNL and it didn't work. I hope you saw it; Amy is a genius. I'm really going to miss her when she leaves very soon to have a baby and then goes to work on what I fear is going to be a disaster, an spinoff of The Office. I mean seriously. The Office is amazing, just like its British predecessor, but come on - even they know they got lucky with the perfect combination of writers and actors. That magic doesn't happen very often as evidenced in all the utter crap that pollutes TV every day.
Hey, did you know there was an election coming up in less than two weeks? No, I'm serious. And I'm having a hard time refraining from turning this blog into one big political rant, but there are already too many of those as it is, so I won't. I'm sure I'll have SOMETHING to say November 5th, but even then I'll keep it to a minimum. I will tell you this though. Eight years ago on election night, Brian dealt with the stress by drinking hundreds and hundreds of beers. I stayed at work late that night, where I also got into trouble and by trouble I mean, fuck was I stupid. So I made a rule for this election day/night. NO BEER. I'm dead ass serious. He looked at me weird when I said it, like "What? I wasn't even thinking about getting beer!" Sure. I'm not new here; I know how these things work. I'd love to take a few (hundred) sedatives to deal with everything that night, but I'm not going to. We're both going to have to suffer through this dead ass sober. I am the fun police and I declare that night a No Fun Zone.
Update on the Princess of Darkness and the Saga from the Trailer Park. She went out the other night with Drunky's brother, a transvestite. I'm telling you, I can't make this shit up! They went to a gay strip bar where she met a guy who works there as part of the "entertainment", i.e. a stripper. She went home with him that night and they hooked up. He told her, yes he works in a gay bar, yes he lives with a male roommate who's in love with him and yes he was raised by two dads, but don't worry because he himself is totally straight. Straight as an arrow, yep. He LOVES her little boobs and the fact that she's built like a boy (yes, he said that) but he is straight. I asked my source if they had sex in any position besides doggie and she said she didn't know. Because my guess would be no. She is completely smitten with this guy, calling him at work and giggle-whispering into the phone, pretty much acting like a total tool. She really and truly believes this is her new boyfriend. So. If you were feeling bad about your love life before reading this? I provided this story as a public service announcement to make you feel better.
You are welcome.